We are in the same boat. 

I'm sure this isn't the best way to deal with the situation, but we've taught our daugher that if she offers her younger brother something different in exchange for what he has, more often than not, he'll trade her.  My 15 month old has the attention span of a gnat, so he's easily distracted by most things she offers.  She likes trying to swindle him out of the goods by trading him something she doesn't want anyway. 

We'll see how long that lasts.  I'm sure others will have better ideas... I'll be keeping an eye on this discussion.

We're also in the same boat, and I've been doing the same thing as BooyahsMomma -- teaching my older son (2.5yrs) to offer my younger daughter (10mos) something in exchange.  He gives her a toy or book he doesn't want, and she's usually only distracted for a minute or two (she wants what HE has, no matter what it is).  But right now, since she's limited to belly-crawling, that's long enough for my son to take the coveted toy to another part of the house where she can't follow.  Unfortunately, I know this won't last for long so I'm going to have to come up with something better.

I have tried to explain to him (and to let him overhear me explaining the same thing to my daughter, even though she's too young to understand) that most toys are for sharing and we all take turns.  I give examples of how Mommy and Daddy share pretty much everything in the house (the telephone, the remotes, the car keys -- all of those "toys" that my son really wants to play with).  I do allow both of them to have a couple "special" toys that aren't for sharing, just as I don't share my camera and Daddy doesn't share his golf clubs.  I let him choose what his special toys are and we put them in a drawer that is just for him, and I've put a couple special toys for her in another drawer.

I've also been known to "time out" a toy because "Playing with and sharing this toy seems to make you very unhappy, so we'll put it away for a bit until we can all have fun with it."

These are just a few ideas -- can't say how successful they've been because it changes from day to day.  I'm just hoping that I'm setting the tone for future sharing, especially since my daughter will soon be more mobile.  And she's quite persistent and passionate about expressing her thoughts.  :)

I too will be keeping an eye on this discussion!

Oh Wenmei, what great ideas!! Thank you so much. And thank you too BooyahsMomma for the ideas as well. We did the "give a toy to get a toy" trick for the first couple of months that Mr. Man was scooting, but now that he's a pretty quick crawler, we're getting strapped for ideas. Sweetness tears down the hall and slams the door to keep him from coming into her room, gets very upset when he follows her to her room, and is always snatching things from him because he now goes after whatever she's holding regardless of what she puts in front of him.

I know she's getting frustrated and I help her give words to that feeling. I pretty much have to referee all the time now to keep her from hauling off and slapping him. However, that happened twice tonight.

Wenmei, great idea about the time out for the toys. I pulled that one this morning and she went into a total tantrum about it (mentioned it in today's post actually). That might work in time. I'm keeping it up. And great work talking to each kid the same, even though the youngest doesn't get it. I do the same thing both for the older one's benefit and to help me develop my habits.

I'm going to do a little research on this one and report back what I can find. :)